Okay stupid question here, but I'm moving to Philadelphia in August with a friend. We are both graduated and are just moving somewhere. She's gone to school in Philly for the past year so I guess technically, I'm just moving out there.

Anyways my question is... how does dating in "big cities" work? It's gotta be different than the college thing I've been doing for the past 4 years. (which wasn't really much dating) it also has to be different than the small town stuff too.

Okay, I guess the better question would be how do you meet people?

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*~laura

yes and no. there are plenty of bars that act as post college parties to pick people up. then, of course, there are scene bars that attract a slightly older (meaning, been working a couple of years and has some money to blow). there are, of course, things like friday nights at the art museum where they have music, food, drinks, etc (and art too!). kelly drive seems to work. some gyms are meat markets. i there are dating "things" like spee dating. know nothing about it. of course, the best way is through mutual friends. parties. just like getting a job. but you coudl probably stand in a park like rittenhouse on a nice day and meet people too. of course, it all depends on the person.

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I've heard that Habitat for Humanity is a good place to hook up ...

Seriously though, I would pursue your interests, get settled and let your network of friends and people you meet work for you. If you're a person of faith, I would check out some of the places where younger people worship.

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People here are pretty friendly and proactive--more likely than not you will be "met" before you have a chance to worry about meeting anyone.

But my advice as someone older and attached to someone younger and single--if you see someone interesting, go over and introduce yourself. Nothing wrong with being forward. If they are put off by it for some reason, then they are not for you. It's simple.

In other words, I'm lazy, rich and good looking. Please hit on me.

Sorry, I couldn't resist, this has no basis as to wether you are actually lazy or rich in real life. :-)

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I'd say at your age it shouldn't be too hard. Manayunk and Old City are full of single young people.

I imagine meeting someone in a bar would be similar to meeting someone at a party for you at this stage of life, but I'd be a bit more cautious about giving out info about where you live, what your daily routine is, etc., than you would have been on a college campus. You never know who's out there. And give out a cell or work number or an email address that is not your primary email. College can be like a bubble, and it's good to always bear in mind that you're out of it now -- of course, the sense of security women have *inside* the bubble is often false, anyway, but that's another matter.
If you're out with your roommate or other friends, have some signal that you need "bailing out" or the like, just in case someone is giving you the creeps or won't leave you alone. And always, ALWAYS carry a cell phone and plenty of cab fare (in a separate coin purse from any spending money if possible, along with a few bus tokens, so you'll always know it's there) when you're out on a date.

I'm sorry if all that sounds like I'm being your mom. It's just stuff to bear in mind.

I'm in my mid-thirties and I'm fairly new in Philly, so maybe someone younger ought to give you other kinds of tips that are more of the "fun" variety! ;-)

OK, I'm a little slow today...I don't get the interpretation.

Who ya callin rich, anyway?

WOW!! You paint a horrible picture here. Has it gotten that bad. Do you meet the occasional serial killer or what?

Only when I worked with prison inmates. I actually am not kidding -- I used to work with both male and female inmates in a teaching-type situation, and some of the men were sexual predators and murderers. I have also worked with college students, and bad things have happened to some of them.

I'm not trying to be alarmist -- just thinking of the sensible things a young person ought to do just in case of the worst-case-scenario. There are some scary people out there, and many of them do not seem scary at first . . . better safe than sorry.

Just ride the subway.

Tons of people, some crazy, some sane, will talk to you.

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