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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 06-13-2008, 11:34 AM
Corydon Corydon is offline
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Originally Posted by rpost3 View Post
Obviously I've pissed off a couple people who like asking that question, so explain it to me: exactly why is it important whether someone is a line cook or a engineer?
I enjoy learning about what other people do. A lot of line cooks and engineers do interesting work; if they're smart, interesting people, they probably have some good stories to tell.

So it's a relatively innocuous way to start a conversation. I don't follow sports, and discussing the weather is insipid. I'm certainly not going to talk politics with somebody I've just met; and movies, books, etc. have their own problems. But most people are able to talk about what they do all day, and most people are happy to talk about themselves. If you aren't, you always have the option of changing the subject.
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Old 06-13-2008, 12:29 PM
rpost3 rpost3 is offline
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I enjoy learning about what other people do. A lot of line cooks and engineers do interesting work; if they're smart, interesting people, they probably have some good stories to tell.
Well yeah. I kinda figured that to be the answer. Thing is, only certain types of people think someone's job is relevent to someone's character.

I have 3 groups of friends - a group of restaurant workers, a few resident physicians, and a group of black guys w/ mixed educational and occupational backgrounds. I've never heard any of them ask someone what their job is, and all hate that question.

Doctors hate this question more than anybody. They always vaguely answer w/ "I work in healthcare," or "I work at Jefferson." Unable to take a hint, this is always followed by "What do you do there?" until they relent and say they're a physician. THe interrogator either says "Nuh uh. Seriously?" or acts overly impressed, which can be embarassing. I've even seen people respond w/ "Surgery huh? No ****. That's where the real money is. Good work."

The group of dudes crack up and silently groan when they get this question b/c people always act surprised that a black guy in a throwback jersey has a good job in finance (it's true, I see it happen...hillarious). They understand when a woman asks it b/c they think they're all gold diggers, but they think any dude who asks them this question is suspect, and I've seen them say "What do you want to know that for?" I used to never think twice about someone asking me what I do for a living, but these guys are the ones who were telling me how much they hate that question and why, and I started to see their point.

Restaurant workers dislike this question b/c being a server or a line cook is the bane of their existence, so they don't feel like talking about it. That one is obvious.

Last edited by rpost3 : 06-13-2008 at 12:33 PM.
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Old 06-13-2008, 12:37 PM
JillyS JillyS is offline
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::shrug:: if I ask someone that it's usually because I'm interested in them as a person and figure what they do is one facet of who they are.
Me too. I think it's a good way to find common ground or learn something new. I know I personally find it affirming when someone shows a genuine interest in what I do, so I figure others feel the same way when the same interest is shown to them. I have no ulterior motive and couldn't care less what other people make. They aren't the ones paying my bills.
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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 06-13-2008, 12:42 PM
Petra Petra is offline
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Personally I don't think it is an innocent question; I find when people are asking it they're trying to put you in your box and decided if you are worthy of further consideration.

I know some people would argue "no I'm not, I'm interested in the person." Since when is your job who you are?

Quote:
Doctors hate this question more than anybody. They always vaguely answer w/ "I work in healthcare," or "I work at Jefferson." Unable to take a hint, this is always followed by "What do you do there?" until they relent and say they're a physician.
This has always been my experience. I know a fair number of neurosurgeons, when it comes up in conversation with a stranger it's a real conversation ender.

self important person: "so what do you DO."
Friend: I'm a neurosurgeon.
self important person:Oh...

I particularly hate getting this line from Realtors. They're all trying to see if I can afford the house I'm looking at. I'm pretty sure the bank is in charge of that, not them -- not that they did a very good job of it over the past couple of years. So they need to STFU and show me the damn granite counter tops.

Or maybe it's a great question, I know when people ask it I don't want to speak to them any longer.

ETA:
I also get "what school did you go do" i.e. "did I go to a better school than you" from young 20 somethings.

Last edited by Petra : 06-13-2008 at 12:47 PM.
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Old 06-13-2008, 12:45 PM
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Annie Hall Annie Hall is online now
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Originally Posted by rpost3 View Post
Your real problem is you don't like hearing the truth about yourself. I think any dude who puts poodles in his avatar and admires Woody Allen needs not only therapy, but a sex change.
i'm a woman, you f*cktard.

your posts are annoying, pointless and obnoxious. you just earned a spot on my ignore list, so enjoy your stay.
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Old 06-13-2008, 12:45 PM
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Hospitalitygirl Hospitalitygirl is offline
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haha, glad you called out this ridiculous post ... i'm beginning to think the "r" in rpost stands for "ridiculous"

dude, could you possibly complain about more sh!t?? you don't like anything -- from rittenhouse square to your long distance girlfriend.

find a decent therapist and stfu already.
Ha ha ha, and you picked on me when I said something to him!
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Old 06-13-2008, 12:53 PM
Petra Petra is offline
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i'm a woman, you f*cktard.
Game. Set. Match.

That was classic. Thank you.

I disagree with the job question, however.

One thing I've noticed is that this isn't a question you get in Europe, there it is considered a fairly rude line of inquiry (in my experience).

ETA: In Indian society I find this to be the first question out after "what is your name."
What is your name.
What do you do.
How much to you make (no beating around the bush here).
Are you married. (Only if question 2,3 are satisfactory).

Last edited by Petra : 06-13-2008 at 01:06 PM.
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Old 06-13-2008, 01:18 PM
CityMan CityMan is offline
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I think that the sooner this question is asked to a stranger or brand new aquaintance, the more rude it is.

I often tell the truth, but sometimes I say things like "I'm a burglar," or unemployed, or scientist or drunk or something.
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Old 06-13-2008, 01:23 PM
rpost3 rpost3 is offline
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LOL that's true. The question can be constructive in that I know I don't want to talk to anyone who asks me that right off the bat. I usually get this question from single women, and for some reason, attornies. I also get it a lot when I'm in DC.

Last edited by rpost3 : 06-13-2008 at 01:29 PM.
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Old 06-13-2008, 01:54 PM
gone down south gone down south is offline
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Petra - "since when is your job who you are?" Since it consumes 1/3 - 1/2 of most peoples waking life, I'd say it's a major component of who you are. You can always direct your answer towards hobbies and other interests if you want to, it's a pretty open-ended question.

Rpost- turning this question around, when meeting someone new what do you talk about? How do you make conversation with new acquantainces?
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