So, I'm trying to get service started on my new house... and I'm doing this WAY in advance because I know how long Comcast takes to get off their ass and install service.
So, I fill out the order online, and then as I proceed to checkout, I'm sucked into this IRC chat session with an "analyst" named Angelino... who probably is from India.
I should have used netstat to check what computer I was connected to during the chat session; I'm sure the dude wasn't anywhere in the United States.
So anyway, "Angelino" informs me that Comcast needs to "verify" the address of the house.
I even gave him a link to Google maps showing the location of the property. I even had pictures of the home. It's definitely there.
How long does Comcast need to verify the existence of a building?
FOUR DAYS.
Behold:
user EASTCHESTNUT_ has entered room
EastChestnut(Wed May 7 10:42:19 EDT 2008)>Order Information
analyst Angelino.24573 has entered room
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:42:26 EDT 2008)>Hello EASTCHESTNUT_, Thank you for contacting Comcast Live Chat Support. My name is Angelino.24573. Please give me one moment to review your information.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:42:29 EDT 2008)>I will be happy to assist you with your order today. For verification, can you please give me your full name and address?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:45:05 EDT 2008)>East Chestnut
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:45:10 EDT 2008)>{snip!} Levick, Phila
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:43:21 EDT 2008)>Thank you for that information.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:43:22 EDT 2008)>Are you a new customer?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:45:50 EDT 2008)>anybody home over there?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:45:53 EDT 2008)>ahh
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:45:53 EDT 2008)>yes
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:43:35 EDT 2008)>I will now verify your address.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:43:36 EDT 2008)>One moment please.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:46:21 EDT 2008)>I appreciate your patience; I am still working on this for you, would you mind holding for a little longer?
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:47:25 EDT 2008)>Did you receive my last message?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:50:00 EDT 2008)>yeah I'm sitting here
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:51:10 EDT 2008)>converting oxygen into carbon dioxide
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:48:47 EDT 2008)>EastChestnut, I am very sorry but your address has not yet been found on our database.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:51:30 EDT 2008)>{snip!} Levick Street, Philadelphia PA ?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:51:43 EDT 2008)>ugh lemme check the zip
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:49:25 EDT 2008)>Okay.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:53:13 EDT 2008)>{snip!} LEVICK STREET, PHILADELPHIA PA 19136
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:50:55 EDT 2008)>Thank you for that information.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:53:28 EDT 2008)>It's off Frankford and Levick by the original Chickie and Pete's
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:50:56 EDT 2008)>One moment please.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:53:59 EDT 2008)>I'm sure if you stare hard enough out of the Comcast Center, you can find it :P
analyst Angelino.24573 has been temporarily disconnected. Please wait while the analyst attempts to reconnect.
analyst Angelino.24573 has entered room
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:52:49 EDT 2008)>Oh, I am very sorry EastChestnut but It's not yet on our database. However, I can fill up a serviceability form and inform Comcast about this. This may take 4 days. Is this alright with you?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:55:31 EDT 2008)>http://{URL TO MY HOUSE ON GOOGLE MAPS}
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:55:39 EDT 2008)>Google says the house is there
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:55:45 EDT 2008)>I hope it hasn't been demolished!
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:55:46 EDT 2008)>:P
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:56:09 EDT 2008)>It's probably not in your database because the previous tenant had DirectTV for several years
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:56:24 EDT 2008)>But it was at one point hooked up to cable. The house next door is on Comcast.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:53:57 EDT 2008)>Don't worry, this usually happens. All we can do for now is request for serviceability.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:54:16 EDT 2008)>Do you want me to do this for you?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:56:50 EDT 2008)>Ok, so by the time I finally get service, it will be what... August?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:57:01 EDT 2008)>Cuz it usually takes a month for new installers to turn up
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:54:39 EDT 2008)>No. This will only take 4 days.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:57:16 EDT 2008)>HAHAHAHAH
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:57:21 EDT 2008)>OMG... you funny
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:57:35 EDT 2008)>*sigh* I have no other choice, go ahead.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:55:05 EDT 2008)>This process will put your address in our database so that you can get your service and order.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:55:54 EDT 2008)>I will now fill up the serviceabiliy form. Thank you for your patience East Chestnut.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:58:45 EDT 2008)>There is no one in the house except this coming Saturday... to do repairs. So I guess that date can't be met because of this missing address?
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:56:36 EDT 2008)>Yes.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 10:59:27 EDT 2008)>So, realistically... what possible date could an installer appear?
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:58:10 EDT 2008)>Your ticket number is 3294.15784. This process will take 4 days. Our technician will call when your address is serviceable.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 10:58:14 EDT 2008)>Is there anything else I could assist you with today?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:01:01 EDT 2008)>Yes, explain this process, please.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:00:02 EDT 2008)>I have submitted a serviceability form that will inform Comcast about your address ot found on our database. In this process, they will be able to check and add your address.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:00:23 EDT 2008)>I mean your address not found.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:03:00 EDT 2008)>Wow... It. Takes. Four. Days. To. Do. That.... amazing
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:03:09 EDT 2008)>I've got a bad feeling about this
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:00:35 EDT 2008)>I know how inconvenient this might be for you but rest assured that I’ll be more than happy to help you on this.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:00:37 EDT 2008)>Do you have any other questions for me today?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:04:09 EDT 2008)>Yes, when the four days are up--who do I contact to cancel the order if I do not get contacted by a Comcast employee?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:04:21 EDT 2008)>Like, phone # and what order # to cancel
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:02:06 EDT 2008)>Your order has not yet been processed.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:04:41 EDT 2008)>because the house is already wired for DirectTV and it already has a HD box
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:04:44 EDT 2008)>ahh ok
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:02:21 EDT 2008)>You will need to re order after this process.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:02:25 EDT 2008)>Do you have any other questions for me today?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:05:06 EDT 2008)>Whoa...
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:05:15 EDT 2008)>You mean you need 4 days to verify my address...
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:05:20 EDT 2008)>and after that... then order service again?
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:03:08 EDT 2008)>Yes, I am very sorry for the inconvenience this has caused you EastChestnut.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:06:00 EDT 2008)>
Well that's not very Comcastic, is it?
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:03:51 EDT 2008)>
I am really sorry. I really do.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:03:57 EDT 2008)>Is there anything else I could assist you with today?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:06:45 EDT 2008)>Yeah you're enjoying the new building over at 17th and JFK?
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:04:59 EDT 2008)>I am sorry EastChestnut, I am in a national call center and not familiar with that.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:05:11 EDT 2008)>Do you have any other questions for me today?
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:07:54 EDT 2008)>Oh I see... I happen to work next door to Comcast's headquarters. Just wondering
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:08:12 EDT 2008)>No I think I'm done now. I'll wait/pray/hope for someone at Comcast to call me.
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:08:28 EDT 2008)>I'll fish out my Rosary beads and pray to Santa Maria.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:05:54 EDT 2008)>Thank you for contacting Comcast! We appreciate your business!
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:05:54 EDT 2008)>If you need assistance in the future, please do not hesitate to contact us through Live Chat or E-Mail (available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week). Comcast also offers excellent FAQ and Help forums located at
www.comcast.com to help you reach a resolution independently.
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:05:55 EDT 2008)>Have a great day!
EASTCHESTNUT_(Wed May 7 11:08:30 EDT 2008)>bye now!
Angelino.24573(Wed May 7 11:06:06 EDT 2008)>Analyst has closed chat and left the room
analyst
Angelino.24573 has left room